So, I have an interview coming up, which begs the dreaded
question – what should I wear?
To start, part of my process for all interview preparation
is to grieve the fact that I cannot wear jeans or running pants on interview
day. Given my strong preference for comfortable
casualwear, dressing for an interview feels like a punishment. As I pass over my favorite pair of perfectly
broken in jeans, I often end up selecting a pair of black dress pants. Classic.
Unassuming. What can an
interviewer project onto black pants? They
fit the role of professional interviewee nicely. Of course, I have orange and pink dress
slacks, but those feel risky. I have to
feel out this new atmosphere before I spring orange pants on them.
Now I have on pants. Other decisions await me. Once I’ve succumbed to black dress pants, I
often fall prey to the white button up shirt.
I longingly gaze and my silk floral shirt or polka dot cardigan, but I
wonder what my interviewer will think.
If I look ‘too feminine’ will they assume that I am unassertive,
passive, and cloyingly sweet. Can I
still be perceived as a tenacious, competent, and achievement-oriented in my
lavender, polka dot cardigan with cute oversized buttons? I’ve never met my
interviewer, but a voice inside my head says to play it safe.
Top it off with a black blazer. Now I look like a bureaucrat. Perfect. I’m
almost ready for my interview.
Shoes and hair are the finishing touches. Heels are a no-go for me. I’m 5’8’’ already. When I wear heels, I become a spectacle for
others to comment on or stare at.
Moreover, my height becomes intimidating. Now that I have achieved not looking too
feminine, I can’t swing too far to the masculine side. If I’m nearly 6 feet tall in a suit, then I’m
on track to be perceived as the overly-assertive, aggressive bitch. No thanks. Flats it is.
And lastly to my hair…. I have long, red hair. Amazing red hair that if full of volume,
waves and personality. Usually I let my
crowning glory hang uninhibited, but for interview day, a nice bun or plait
will do. If I leave my hair
unencumbered, it certainly does not look coiffed. Does that make me look haphazard or
lazy? Does it make me look too young to
have long, flowing locks? Because in
addition to finding the balance between femininity and masculinity, I also have
to balance looking young (which is an asset) but not so young that I look
inexperienced.
Well, now I’m dressed, and I’m mentally exhausted. I think I need a nap before my
interview. But then I’d just have to
re-iron my clothes and fix my hair again.
Do other women go through similar mental gymnastics when
preparing for an interview? I find
myself frustrated that I play it safe and suppress the expression of certain parts
of my personality. However, the
competitive and achievement-oriented woman inside of me wants to be a player in
the game. I want the job. And when I get the job, I can do my part to
facilitate some change. I’ll integrate
my pink pants, lustrous mane, and (occasionally) heels. I’ll get in by playing the game. Hopefully, I can help rewrite the rules once
inside.
-Written by Katy Haynes Owen, M.Ed., Ed.S.
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